Beauty and the Badass
by maryjblige4evr
Summary: Kurt's gay. Puck's a badass. You know what that means. SEXY MAN LUVVINZ! Rated M for sexual things to come in later chapters. And cussing. Lots and lots of cussing. Enjoy!
1. The Beggining of the Beginning

**Hello everyone! This is my first Glee fanfic, I'm so Excited! Starring as the lead couple will be none other than the sexy, scrum-diddly-umptious Puck and Kurt! YAY! SPOILER ALERT! This fic will take you through most of the episodes, although I do intend to change a few things, evil smile. You have been warned. I don't own Glee, otherwise there'd be more sexy man luvvinz goin' on. Enjoy!**

**Pilot**

Kurt Hummel isn't what most people consider normal. He has flawless skin, a slight lisp, and a never ending wardrobe filled with exotic designer clothing. And to top it all off, he has an amazing singing voice. You'd think he'd be the most popular boy in school, right? Right? WRONG! You see, most of the things that describe Kurt also describe half of West Hollywood. He might have been more popular had he been born there. But no, Kurt was fated to live in Lima, Ohio, the small, Hicksville town of the damned. A place where people were so narrow-minded, even Kate Moss would have a hard time moving around in there. Kurt was gay, that much was obvious, but that didn't mean anyone liked it.

Slushie facials, shoves into lockers, and dumpster dives are a normal part of Kurt's life. Even at this very moment, Kurt is about to take his morning dumpster dive. Karofsky, Azimio, and Puckerman are holding Kurt, getting ready to chuck him over, when-

"Stop."

Kurt looks over and sees Finn Hudson, quarterback and captain of the football team, gazing at the scene before him. The other boys lower Kurt and Finn motions him forward. Kurt walks over, mesmerized by the tall boy's compassion. He takes Kurt's bag, coat, and hat and set them on the ground near the dumpster. The other boys pick Kurt up again and, with a nod from Finn, they toss him in. Somehow, even if he allowed the others to toss him away like a piece of trash, Kurt now finds himself falling madly in love with Finn Hudson.

PK PK PK PK PK PK PK PK PK PK PK PK

Noah "Puck" Puckerman is grade-A, 100%, straight up badass. Nobody messes with Puck, unless they wanna end up in the hospital. Puck is on the football team, is dating(actually just sleeping with) the school bitch, Santana, and he's got a sweet Mohawk.

As he, Finn, and the others left the dumpster in the parking lot, Puck doesn't even take a second glance at what he just did. He knew he giving people the wrong impression, beating up the gay kid. I mean, don't get him wrong, Puck is a badass, a _straight _badass, but he's not homophobic. In fact, Puck has an uncle who's gay, more or less. Puck never could tell the difference between being gay and being a transvestite. As Puck continues his confusing inner monologue, the group have already taken their seats in the back of Geometry, a class they share with Hummel.

Three minutes after the bell rings, Kurt enters, the teacher barely giving him so much as a nod before continuing with his lecture. He doesn't care. None of the teachers do. Puck should be happy about this, seeing as this means he won't get caught, but it kind of pisses him off. You see kiddies, Puck grew up without a father, which is probably why he acts out, in an attempt to gain everyone's attention. It sort of works, but not as well as Puck would hope. You see, Puck is constantly overshadowed by Finn, the golden boy, the one who never does wrong. It pissed Puck off that Finn got away with doing half the shit he did and he always got caught. It wasn't fair! Whatever. Puck continues to gaze aimlessly around the room until he sees Hummel.

He didn't know why everyone gave him hell for being gay. Personally, puck did it just for the sick, twisted sensation he got from watching the boy squirm under his glare. Puck could list about half the population of McKinley High who were in the closet gays, bis, lesbians, drag queens, etc. And it's not like it's contagious. Homosexuality is a preference to the same sex instead of the opposite. You're born with this mentality whether you're subconsciously aware of it or not. Some people know their whole lives, while others have to wait until they've matured past giggling about words like 'penis' and 'boobies'. Granted, Puck still laughed at those words but regardless. Puck thought society should want to accept it, being that it helps keep the population down and, if no one had to hide their preferences, it made tolerance and co-existence much easier to work with.

Puck blinks and shakes his head a little. Did he just have a deep thought? The weed the old drama teacher gave must have just kicked in. In fact, it was because of this weed, and several restraining orders, that said drama teacher was fired. Now Mr. Scheuster, the Spanish 2 teacher, was taking over the Glee club.

Puck really hoped Mr. Schue got a lot of people to sign up for the club. The more Gleeks, the more Slushie facials.

Kurt stopped in the hallway on his way to his next class to sign up for 'New Directions' Mr. Scheu's new Glee club.

**Tada! So what'ya think? Pretty good for a first chapter, right? I'm not sure where this story is going, which makes it all the more fun! R&R please!**


	2. Saturday Mornings

**New Chapter! Ok because it would take fo EVVVAAAH to do this by episodes, im gonna skip around a bit and rewrite some things. Why? Because I can, sista! Lolz enjoy.**

Kurt couldn't help but cringe at the sight before him. The new Glee club. What a rag tag team of misfits. There was Artie, the handicapped nerd who felt the need to tell everyone his penis still worked. There was Tina, the gothic Asian girl with a stutter. There was Mercedes, the large blackaliscious diva whom Kurt was becoming great friends with. And then there was Rachel. Kurt could honestly say that he had never met anyone as bossy as Rachel Berry. She nagged, complained, and felt the need to remind everyone of how superior she was. Kurt didn't even really like her singing voice. It sounded more like screeching than anything. Plus, she had no real tone. Which made her a perfect match for Finn, who was also now a part of Glee. Kurt knew this was a sign from the God he didn't believe in. So, he asked Mr. Schue for a diva-off to see who should be the lead vocalist.

And that was what Kurt was thinking about when he entered the body shop his father owned that Saturday morning. The walls were a boring, slightly ugly, faded light green. The floor was dirty, covered with tools and grease and oils stains. As long as he wasn't in his good clothing, Kurt didn't mind the mess. He walked to the back of the shop, into his dad's office.

His father looked up from his paperwork and smiled. "Hey bud, what's up?" Kurt smiled. "Hey Dad." Kurt loved his father. He was the only person in the world who loved and care for him unconditionally, now that his mother was gone. But Kurt felt terrible. He still hadn't came out to his dad, and it was killing him inside. He wanted to tell him, but he was worried. His father was a man, a manly man, who liked to do manly things. Kurt, eh…..not so much. He knew it was just a matter of time before he found out.

Kurt hugged his dad and left the shop, heading for home. When he arrived, Kurt went into his room and closed the door. His room was the basement, stylishly furnished to accommodate Kurt's eccentric tastes. He went through his play list, searching for a song. He had all week but still, he wanted lots of time to rehearse. While Kurt was busy with his song, Puck was having a rather interesting morning.

When Puck woke up to the horrid sounds of birds chirping, he realized something was slightly off. He was in a pink room. In a pink bed. With Quinn. And, disturbingly enough, Finn. And no pants. Empty raspberry wine cooler bottles littered the floor. Puck groaned at the thought of what might have happened last night. And with FINN? Out of all the dudes in Lima, it HAD to be Finn. He really hoped it was rough and painful for the frankenteen. That is, if they even did it. Puck hoped not. Puck may be open minded, but Finn was just nasty. Quickly, hoping not to wake the other two, he pulled on his pants and bolted out the door.

Monday was hell for Puck. First off, when he threw Hummel into the dumpster, the already overflowing metal box tipped over onto them, covering them all in garbage. Then, he got yelled at by Coach Sylvester for "making her look at his ugly face day after day." And Hummel joined the football team. He batted his eyelashes and gave Finn the I'm-cute-so-do-what-I-say-or-I-will-smuffocate-you-with-adorableness look, and he was McKinley's new kicker. Puck couldn't believe that Finn could be so easily swayed. He guessed that Finn didn't care what the gender, as long as he was getting attention. And, to top it all off, he was forced by Coach Tanaka to join Glee, along with a few other of his teammates. This time, it was a Miss Emma Pillsbury who batted her lashes and gave the 'Death by Adorableness Smuffocation' look. So now, he was part of Glee. Fuuuuuuuuck.


	3. Only Hope

**Hello everyone. This chapter is very important, this is where we get to some of the more juicy tidbits. Yummi! Anyways, enjoy!**

**P.S.-Glee is not mine, no matter how many times I ask for it from Fox, Santa, and Jesus.**

Puck slowly made his way to Glee practice. He still couldn't believe he was being forced to participate in this stupid club. He, Matt and Mike, the only other football players in the club besides Finn, all sat together in the back of the choir room. Seeing as they were forced to join just the day before, they were excused from that week's assignment. So Puck, being the lazy slacker he is, decided to sit back an try to get some sleep. Apparently there was some sort of diva-off going on between Berry and Hummel.

Kurt was furious. When he told Mr. Schue he wanted to sing 'Defying Gravity' from 'Wicked' the day before, he shook his head sadly at him. "I'm sorry, Kurt, but Rachel asked me if she could sing that this morning. You'll have to find another song, I'm afraid." Luckily for Kurt, he had a back-up song anyways. It wasn't as good as 'Wicked', in his opinion, but it would do fine. He glared daggers at Rachel's back as she went up. He tried his hardest to tune her out but he couldn't.

_I hope you're happy! I hope you're happy now I hope you're happy how you Hurt your cause forever I hope you think you're clever! I hope you're happy I hope you're happy, too I hope you're proud how you Would grovel in submission To feed your own ambition _

Kurt was beyond enraged. She was singing both parts! And not doing very well, he might add.

_So though I can't imagine how I hope you're happy right now Elphie, listen to me. Just say you're sorry: You can still be with the Wizard What you've worked and waited for You can have all you ever wanted: I know: But I don't want it - No - I can't want it Anymore: Something has changed within me Something is not the same I'm through with playing by the rules Of someone else's game Too late for second-guessing Too late to go back to sleep It's time to trust my instincts Close my eyes: and leap! It's time to try Defying gravity I think I'll try Defying gravity And you can't pull me down! Can't I make you understand? You're having delusions of grandeur: I'm through accepting limits ''cause someone says they're so Some things I cannot change But till I try, I'll never know! Too long I've been afraid of Losing love I guess I've lost Well, if that's love It comes at much too high a cost! I'd sooner buy Defying gravity Kiss me goodbye I'm defying gravity And you can't pull me down: Glinda - come with me. Think of what we could do: together. Unlimited Together we're unlimited Together we'll be the greatest team There's ever been Dreams, the way we planned 'em If we work in tandem: There's no fight we cannot win Just you and I Defying gravity With you and I Defying gravity They'll never bring us down! Well? Are you coming? I hope you're happy Now that you're choosing this You too I hope it brings you bliss I really hope you get it And you don't live to regret it I hope you're happy in the end I hope you're happy, my friend: So if you care to find me Look to the western sky! As someone told me lately: "Ev'ryone deserves the chance to fly!" And if I'm flying solo At least I'm flying free To those who'd ground me Take a message back from me Tell them how I am Defying gravity I'm flying high Defying gravity And soon I'll match them in renown And nobody in all of Oz No Wizard that there is or was Is ever gonna bring me down! I hope you're happy! Look at her, she's wicked! Get her! _

Both Puck and Kurt couldn't help but join in with the rest of the cub in singing the citizen's of Oz' part.

_Bring me down! No one mourns the wicked So we've got to bring her Ahhh! Down!_

Everyone except the Jocks clapped for her. Even Kurt respectfully clapped lightly. Kurt got in front of the group as Rachel sat down. Knowing who this particular song was for, he took a deep breath, and as the piano man started, Kurt looked out at the club and began:

_There's a song that's inside of my soulIt's the one that I've tried to write over and over againI'm awake in the infinite coldBut You sing to me over and over and over again_

_So I lay my head back downAnd I lift my handsand pray to be only YoursI pray to be only YoursI know now you're my only hope_

He looked at Finn as he sang, not noticing Puck staring at him._Sing to me the song of the starsOf Your galaxy dancing and laughingand laughing againWhen it feels like my dreams are so farSing to me of the plans that You have for me over again_

Puck was slightly irritated, and he wasn't quite sure why.

_So I lay my head back downAnd I lift my hands and prayTo be only yoursI pray to be only yoursI know now you're my only hopeI give You my destinyI'm giving You all of meI want Your symphonySinging in all that I amAt the top of my lungs I'm giving it back_

Hitting much higher than a high F, Kurt looked very smug as he watched Rachel Berry's smug face turn to a look of shock and anger.

_So I lay my head back downAnd I lift my hands and prayTo be only yoursI pray to be only yoursI pray to be only yoursI know now you're my only hope_

By the end of the song, he much closer to Finn's chair than before. Leaning in close, he finished the melody.

_Mmmmm, mmmhhmmm, Oooooo-oooh_

Everyone clapped and cheered. Finn looked nervous, Rachel looked pissed, And Puck looked crossed between angry and confused. Why did everyone fall for Finn? Why was he always second best? It wasn't fair. He was tired of living in Finn's shadow. Don't him wrong, he loved his best friend, but he didn't want to always lose to him.

Shaking himself so as to stop his inner jealous Finn bashing, Puck was actually quite surprised. Who knew Kurt could sing like that? It was actually very beautiful. The sing that is, not Kurt. No way in hell did Puck just think Kurt was beautiful. Nope. No way.

"Kurt!" Mr. Schue exclaimed, "That was amazing! I had no idea you were this talented! At any rate, class, what did you think? Who should be our second lead vocalist?" Almost everyone raised their hand for Kurt, most just out of pure hatred for Rachel. In fact, Rachel was the only one who raised their hand for her. She huffed and stormed out of the room, telling them to come and find her when they realize who _truly_ deserved the lead. They all ignored her and congratulated Kurt on a job well done.

The next day, Quinn had gone to meet Finn and Puck by their adjoining lockers. She approached them, both looking equally confused. "Guys," she said, "I think I'm pregnant." The only other person who heard that was Kurt, who had been shoved into one of the lockers close by.


	4. Dear Journal

**Hello everyone! Just for Shits and giggles, I've decided to bring more attention to a very special character, enjoy!**

_Dear Journal, _

_Today Principal Figgins informed me that the Glee club would be using MY auditorium for their pathetic attempt at a pep rally. Those no talent, snot nosed dweebs don't have any real conception of what a pep rally is about. So anyway, as I begrudgingly walked over to the Nerd's Den to give them the news, I overheard Ladyface singing some sentimental song for Frankenteen. Now let me be clear, Journal, this is a very private secret I've given you the honor of hearing, so you better not tell anyone, or you will PAY. I like Ladyface. He's talented, much too talented for the likes of one Will Scheuster._

_Anywho, as I listened from outside the door, a thought occurred to me. An ingenious thought, seeing as I, Sue Sylvester, was the one to think of it. What if I could get control of Ladyface, and have him, Quinn, Santana, and Brittany destroy the Glee club from the inside for me? Oh, how glorious that would be. Having Scheuster's precious little Glee club destroyed right in front of his eyes, it almost makes me feel bad for him. Almost. _

_So it's decided, Journal, I will make the Gay Glee member a Cheerio. And yes, I know what you're thinking, Journal, but so what? Ok, so he doesn't have the lady parts to match his Ladyface, but do you think something as trivial as a penis is going to stop Sue Sylvester? I think not. _

_And I think I may just have the perfect way to bring him to my side. It's quite obvious Ladyface has a serious crush on Frankenteen. To see that much puppy love in someone's eyes is just sickening, let me tell you Journal. Still, I can use this to my advantage. The only hope Ladyface has of getting even an endearing look from Frankenteen, is to join the Cheerios. After all, jocks, being the simple-minded, steroid-infused apes that they are, will always, and I do mean always, Journal, date a cheerleader, regardless of gender. Now all I have to do is inform him of this, and the love struck boy will soon be in the clutches of Sue Sylvester. _

_Now, on to other matters, it seems to me that Fabray might be pregnant. She walks around with that shameful look in her eyes that only Fatties and Preggers have. And I can smell the baby hormones emanating from her pale, clammy body. Perhaps this too can be used to my advantage. Ladyface can take her spot as captain, and Frankenteen will dump Preggers for Ladyface, all to keep his image as 'Popular Star Quarterback With The Head Cheerleader Girlfriend'. Oh, how do I come up with these marvelous ideas, Journal? Have the Gods blessed me with a fierce, warrior-like mind as well as a fit, sexy physique? Of course not, that's preposterous. There is only one god. And that, dear Journal, is Sue Sylvester._

_I will return to you soon, Journal, to describe to you in detail the events of these next few days. You will not be disappointed._

_-Sue _

**LOLOLOLZ! I'm sorry but I had to, Sue's Friggin' AMAZINZ! I'm definitely going to have to do this again, it's too much fun! So anyways, review and keep reading! It only gets better from here.**


	5. Cheerios and Bad Pairings

**Hello all! Sorry I haven't posted in awhile, I was on the beach, which gave me lovely ideas for future chapters and OC's! YAY! Ok, so you're all going to hate me, but I just HAVE to do it! My inner fan girl is making me! She has a gun to my head! Plz don't flame me, or I will be forced to kill you all ****J enjoy!**

Puck walked around school in a daze the rest of the day. He couldn't believe Quinn was Preggers. What was even worse, either he or Finn was the father. Finn refused to speak to either of them after that. But, after a few hours, he was back to cuddling with Quinn, only to dump her the next day when he found out she had been kicked off the Cheerios. Now this truly worried Puck, because this meant that something was going on in old Sylvester's mind, something devious.

Of course, this wasn't all that was on Puck's mind. You see, underneath all the badassness and possible diseases originating from 45 year old cougars, Puck was a very deep guy. When he wanted to be. And right now, he was trying to figure out the impossible puzzle that is Kurt Hummel. Puck supposed, on a sub-conscious level, he always had a certain attraction to Kurt. He picked on him the most, pushed him the most, and was always thinking of ways to humiliate the boy. Kurt took up most of Puck's free time all through out elementary and middle school, and when junior high came around, Puck had broken from his pre-pubescent cocoon, and he emerged as a lovely, badass butterfly, who-

What a second, _butterfly?_ You see, _this _is why Puck didn't have deep thoughts, the inner dumbass takes reign after awhile. Anywho, Puck realized that, until he joined football, Kurt was his 24-hour obsession.

Which made it easy to see why Puck had become obsessed with him again. Hearing Kurt sing created a spark in Puck, a spark which ignited a fire in Puck. Puck could now see what drove his crazed obsession for all these years. Love. Not that he'd ever admit it out loud, but it was true. Noah Elijah Puckerman was in love with Kurt Elizabeth Hummel. He wanted Kurt as his, and would stop at _nothing_ to get him.

Finn was absolutely horrified. He was in Glee, barely considered a football player, his now ex-girlfriend was off the Cheerios _and_ pregnant, and to top it all off, he had just found out the other day about Kurt's massive crush on him.

I mean, Kurt's an okay guy, but that was the exact problem. He's a _guy_. With a penis. And no boobs. And oh, how Finn loved boobs. So in reality it wouldn't work out in the slightest. What poor Finn doesn't realize, however, is that this is high school, which is the farthest you could ever possibly get from reality.

Kurt could not believe his ears. When he was escorted to Coach Sylvester's office by Coach Sylvester herself, he was almost sure it was for another hour long lecture on sneaky gays, not becoming a Cheerio. The scary cheerleading coach leered at him from her desk. "Now listen here, Ladyface, Preggers has been kicked off the team, and I want you to take her place. Your workouts and practices, while less exerting, will not be any easier. You will be our first vocal cheerleader, along with your friend Aretha. And you WILL join, because Sue Sylvester does NOT take no for an answer, just ask my five ex-husbands." Kurt was too happy and intimidated to say no. He left Coach Sylvester's office an hour later(he still got the 'Sneaky Gays' lecture) in a Head Cheerio uniform and rushed off to tell Mercedes to get her uniform as well.

Quinn was about ready to kill herself. But not before killing that Ben Jacob Israel kid for telling the entire school about her pregnancy. She lost her position as Head Cheerio, only to later find out that she was replaced by Kurt and Mercedes, the rejects from Glee. And Finn dumped her. She hated her life. She decided that the only thing that could make things a little easier was to win Finn back. She knew the only way to do that was to join Glee. Mr. Schue had no qualms about letting her, Santana, and Brittany join. She nearly at the first meeting, however, when Kurt walked in wearing _her_ Head Cheerio uniform. You could almost see the symbolic Ice Queen tiara on his head, or maybe he was wearing one of his a_ctual_ tiaras, who knew.

Finn was still at a loss as to what to do about his dying status as King of the School when Kurt walked in. That of course, dear children, is when Finn's tiny, 5-watt light bulb kicked in and gave him an idea. He would date Kurt. Finn didn't mind kissing a dude like Kurt, as long as he didn't have to touch his junk. And Finn would get his status back. He knew it was probably wrong to use Kurt's feelings for him for his own personal gain, but still, his image was at stake! So he decided it. Kurt would be _his_. Little did he know, puck was thinking the exact same thing.

***hides behind flame-proof glass* Is it safe to come out? Ok, I know what you're thinking, and yes. I'm putting in some Kinn. But don't worry my lovelies! Through the long journey I plan on dragging your sorry white asses through, I will end this story with a happy Purt ending. And who knows, maybe I'll write a sequel. Hope you enjoyed the chapter, R&R!**


	6. Confessions and Scribbly Notes

**Hola! New Chapteeeeerr! I haven't updated because I'm too lazy. Anyway, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer.**

"I'm gay."

Kurt's eyes widened at the words that had just flown out of his mouth. Two tiny words that would change his life. It was almost comical, the way Burt Hummel simply stood there, dumbfounded. After what seemed like an eternity, Burt's face slowly morphed into a small smile.

"I know."

He embraced his son, holding him as if he feared Kurt would disappear if he didn't. Upon feeling his father's warm embrace, Kurt broke down, his salty tears staining one of his father's many hideous flannel shirts. After a long conversation about Kurt and the amount of love his father had for him, both Hummels had left the dining room with smiles on their faces.

The next day, Kurt headed to Coach Sylvester's mandatory Saturday Cheerio's meeting. The work was demanding, but the Cheerio's were rewarded with pizza and diet soda afterwards, mostly so the Cheerio's could take more of the Glee Club's funding money, but no one really cared. Accompanied by Mercedes, Kurt made his way over to Coach Sylvester, looking as cynical and haughty as ever.

"Porcelain, Aretha," she said, her steel blue eyes cutting through the two Gleeks as she spoke, "You two are the first vocal Cheerios. Congratulations. Now, I want both of you to run twenty laps while singing Madonna's greatest hits to prepare you for the upcoming pep rally. If you fail, I will be forced to scalp you both and ship your hair off to your precious GaGa to use as either a blonde wig or a ridiculous hat. Now, MOVE!" The next four hours would be longest of young Kurt Hummel's life. He went home later that day sore ALL over. He checked his phone. He saw one text message from an unknown number.

**Hey Kurt, its Finn. I was wndring if we could tlk monday?**

Kurt smiled, and promptly texted back.

**Sure, I'll see you then.**

Laying back onto his bed, Kurt drifted off, dreaming of Finn and the upcoming Monday.

**Monday**

Puck was glad no one was around to witness his moment of unbadass-ness. He was sliding a rather ragged slip of paper into Kurt's locker, asking to meet him in the auditorium. He knew it was a pussy move, slipping notes into Kurt's locker like a hormonal teenage girl, but Puck was desperate to have Kurt all to himself. He had seen Finn eyeing _his _property, and he didn't like it. Not one bit. The first bell rang, signaling the arrival of crabby, sleep-deprived teenagers. Puck slipped into the crowd, shoving a few students as he did.

Kurt skipped into school, having one of the best days of his life. The jocks were too tired and lazy to throw him into the dumpster(AN: Does anyone else think Karofsky is really lazy?) and Finn had sent him a text telling him to meet him in the auditorium. Kurt stopped by his locker to deposit a few books, frowning as a piece of paper fluttered to the floor. Rather than the usual homophobic slurs, the note contained a time and place for Kurt to meet the writer of said note. Had Kurt not been completely ecstatic about seeing Finn, he would have noticed that the sloppy handwriting on the crinkled paper was nowhere near close to the chicken scratch writing he had become accustomed to reading whenever he went through an unsuspecting Finn's backpack. Instead, Kurt simply took it as a reminder from Finn to meet him. Kurt hurried off to the auditorium, where, unbeknownst to him, two jocks waited for him.

**Kinda short, but eh. R&R and I might start updating more often ; D **


	7. RENT!

**New Chapter!**

**Disclaimer.**

Kurt entered the auditorium and gasped at the sight before him. Puck and Finn were beating each other mercilessly. Kurt hurried over and attempted to separate the two much larger boys. When that didn't work, Kurt belted out a high F. clutching their ears, the boys ceased fighting, if only for a moment. " What the hell's going on here?" Kurt demanded. Finn, who was covered in cuts and bruises, spoke first.

"I came in here looking for you, and I saw Puck sitting in here practicing a love song. I bet he's trying to have sex with Quinn, _again._" Puck, who was covered in blood-mostly Finn's-began to defend himself.

"Actually, I came in here to talk to Kurt, not that that's any of your business." Kurt, who was just as surprised to hear this news as Finn, spoke up. "Why? Were you planning on giving me a heads up about my next dumpster dive." He said coldly. Puck, feeling slightly hurt at the comment, simply smirked and said, "Actually, princess, I was planning on asking you out." Puck couldn't help the feeling of satisfaction at Finn's now red, angry face. Kurt, who had become incredibly pale at Puck's confession, turned and ran out of the auditorium, whilst the two boys began beating each other once more.

PKPKPKPKPKPKPKPKP

Glee practice came quickly. Much too quickly for Kurt's liking. Mr. Schue had insisted on more practices, which meant his time spent with both Finn AND Puck was now doubled. Kurt wedged himself between Mercedes and Santana, the three Cheerios becoming quite good friends with each other. Tina sat in Artie's lap, Quinn ,looking emotionally numb, sat next to Brittany and Matt, who was playing rock paper scissors with Mike. Puck sat on end of the room, whilst Finn sat at the other, both boys eyeing Kurt intently. Rachel sat next to Finn, hoping the boy would pay attention to her. Mr. Schue stood in the front of the room, addressing his students as he began to write on the white board.

"Okay guys, for our next Glee assignment, I think we should do…"

He turned away from the board to reveal RENT written in bold red letters.

"Rent!" Mr. Schue beamed at his students, the majority of them looking excited.

"I for one think this is a great idea Mr. Schue," Rachel said annoyingly, "It will give me a great opportunity to showcase my true potential." Santana whipped her head in Rachel's direction and began her bitchy rant. "Now hold up, Dwarf. First off, you're dressed like a handicapable rugrat*, which is seriously disturbing me. Second of all, don't you remember the diva-off? Kurt is our new lead, not you. Which is kind of sad, seeing as someone with a penis beat you at singing high notes. Of course, Kurt's penis has never been proven to exist. However, seeing as his splits aren't as good as mine or Britt's, I can only assume Ladyface here has some pretty adequate Ladyballs." Once upon a time, Kurt would've been both incredibly embarrassed and offended at her remarks, now only sat there, used to the unstoppable hurricane that was Santana's wrath.

It was at this point Mr. Schue decided to intervene. "Santana, while a tad blunt, has a point, Rachel. Kurt, you get first pick at which part you want." Had it been Rachel, the whole choir would be in outrage. However, since it was fairly unanimous that Kurt deserved this privilege, all remained silent. Rachel, whom had now gone into shock, stared at the wall, as is assessing how many head bashes against it it would take to properly kill herself. Kurt sat in silence, contemplating his decision. Finally, he looked up, grinning. "If it's alright with you, Mr. Schue, I think I'd like to play Angel." Mr. Schue smiled, "Of course, Kurt. Now then, the rest of class will be used for auditioning. Tomorrow I will put up the cast list."

~~~~~(I'm lazy and don't feel like writing the auditions sooooooo)~~~~

The next day Kurt flounced over to the list to see who made who. The list read as followed:

Kurt Hummel - _Angel_

Rachel Berry - _Maureen_

Mercedes Jones - _Joanne_

Santana Lopez - _Mimi_

Finn Hudson - _Mark_

Noah Puckerman - _Roger_

Matt Rutherford - _Collins_

Mike Chang - _Benny_

Kurt was excited. It would be a little awkward making smoochie faces at Matt, but from what he'd heard Matt and Mike kinda had a thing going. The color from Kurt's face immediately drained when he realized he'd have to do a sexy dance in hooker boots and a Santa coat in front of Finn, Matt, and worst of all, Puck. It was at this moment Kurt felt a hand grab him and pull him into the nearest Janitor's closet. Kurt groped for the light switch. Upon turning it on, Kurt found himself looking at the face of none other than-

**A CLIFFHANGER! MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA! Oh, I am such a bitch. Hoped you liked the new chapter.**

***I mean no offense when I say handicapable. I'm not prejudiced, I hate everyone! : D Ciao! **


	8. The Drama of Life

**New Chapter! You all most likely hate me now, but I had to! You have no idea the power the voices in my head possess! Especially Penelope, that blonde bitch….. At any rate, to make up for my heinous crime, I'm bringing back a fun chapter idea, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer. **

Quinn Fabray. Kurt could only imagine the anger and turmoil bubbling within the ex-Cheerio. Kurt put up his guard, mentally preparing for a possible cat fight. "Hello Quinn," Kurt said coolly.

"Kurt, I want to say I'm sorry. Sorry for the way I've made fun of you for being unpopular, sorry for hanging all over Finn to make you jealous, but most of all, I'm sorry for not reporting the bullying I've witnessed throughout the years." Kurt stood there, flabbergasted at the blonde's apology. Kurt had never held much animosity towards Quinn, other than the fact that she cheated on Finn. But, in Kurt's eyes, she had been punished enough for her mistakes. With a small smile forming on his lips, Kurt said, "Thank you, Quinn, for doing what no one, not even Finn, has done." Quinn smiled at him, tearing up slightly. The two teens shared an awkward half hug, leaving the janitor's closet as they did so. Unfortunately, an all too familiar figure loomed in from the shadows.

PORCELAIN! FABRAY! CEASE TOUCHING IMMEDIATELY!"

Standing in a slight pose, megaphone in hand, was none other than Sue Sylvester. "What's the matter with you Fabray? Can't you see poor Porcelain isn't interested in your coslopus? Stop playing beard for all the sneaky gays!" Quinn was so used to the verbal abuse from Sue that she didn't blink an eye at the insults, nor did she question who the other 'sneaky gays' she was playing beard with were. After a two hour long lecture on sneaky gays and using condoms, Kurt and Quinn were sent on their merry way. As the two headed to a local coffee shop to get better acquainted, Sue sat pompously behind her desk, whipped out her pen, and began to write.

_Dear Journal,The nerve of that Fabray! Attempting to turn one of my best Cheerios! I must see to it that Porcelain never again wishes to see the roast beef sandwich that lurks between a woman's thighs. Unfortunately, there's been a delay in my plans. Thanks to my superhuman hearing and ninja stealth, I discovered that Puckerman confessed his love for Kurt. That mohawked delinquent could very well ruin my entire scheme! However, I must look at things from a different aspect. If Puckerman seduces Porcelain, he will break his poor porcelain heart. Then, the Gleek will run into the overly large arms of that gangly gorilla Finn Hudson. Perhaps all is not lost, Journal. In fact, I do believe things may have improved. _

_On another note, I am __OUTRAGED.__ I heard a nasty rumor that those tone-deaf Gleeks are putting on a production of RENT! How dare Schuester attempt to steal time from Cheerio's practice so he can turn a Broadway classic into something fouler than Coach Tanaka's short shorts. With my Madonna assembly coming up, I'm going to need all of my Cheerios 100%, or else I shall become very difficult to work with. That' right, journal. Up until now you have been experiencing the peaceful, friendly Sue Sylvester. But if I can't get my practices in, I may resort to more….violent methods. _

_My word law. My fist is iron. My breasts are sagging.I am Sue Sylvester, Dark lord of ALL._

As rehearsals dragged on and on, Kurt was finding fewer excuses for avoiding Puck and Finn. At the coffee shop, Quinn gave him very valuable information on his two admirers. Kurt knew Finn was the only one for him, yet he hesitated in accepting his dinner invitation. Dating Finn would be cute, fun and romantic. On the other hand, dating Puck would guarantee multiple orgasms for young Kurt Hummel. He knew he had to make a decision, and fast. After spending many a sleepless night thinking and contemplating and fantasizing, Kurt had his mind made up. He loved Finn, and knew that he wanted to only be with Finn. As he entered the auditorium to give Finn the good news, he froze at the sight before him. Rachel and Finn were making out, albeit rather sloppy and awkward. It felt as if Kurt's whole world was shattering right in front of him. All that time wasted flirting, touching, teasing, all seemed much more apparent. As if sensing his presence, Rachel peered over Finn's shoulder and spotted him. "Oh, Kurt!" Rachel said, feigning surprise and guilt. "I didn't see you there." Finn turned and paled when he saw Kurt's devastated figure. "Kurt, I-"

Kurt, still too shocked to respond, simply turned and left, Finn running after him as he did so. "Kurt, stop, please…" Finn begged, grabbing Kurt's arm. Kurt felt something snap deep within him. He whirled around and smacked Finn hard enough to land him on his ass. Kurt glared at the taller boy's fallen figure. "HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU TRICK ME INTO THINKING YOU LIKED ME! HOW DARE YOU BADGER ME FOR WEEKS ABOUT GOING OUT WITH YOU, ONLY TO HAVE ME CATCH YOU MAKING OUT WITH THAT UPTIGHT, FRIGID BITCH!" Finn could do nothing but sit there, tears welling in his eyes. With one last glare, Kurt turned and ran. He ran as far as his feet would take him.

Kurt, Mercedes, Santana, Quinn, Tina and Brittany were all gathered around the TV in Kurt's bedroom, chocolate ice cream tubs laid out in front of them. Destiny's Child was playing softly in the background, the bedroom was filled with major Finn and Rachel bashing. "White boy's gon' get his ASS KICKED!" Mercedes raved, her ghetto alter ego Shetangy* taking complete control. Santana was cursing in Spanish, Tina was filing her nails to a razor-like condition, Quinn was asking God's forgiveness for her future double homicide, and Brittany…..Brittany was talking to the ice cream.

Kurt, being fairly devious and bitchy on his own, began concocting an evil scheme to humiliate the dorky, annoying couple that was Finchel. Kurt smiled at the angry, hormonal women sitting before him. "Alright ladies, here's what we're going to do…"

**Yay! More drama! R&R or my pet goblins will rape your families.*Shetangy (Sha-Tang-y) was a crazy girl on Project Runway who made me giggle.**


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